I am Dying.

Ok not really, and that isn’t really something anyone should joke about, but there is something seriously wrong with me.  After a few failed attempts at trying to get an doctors appointment (I am talking to you evil bitchy receptionist at Midlothian Family Practice) I finally have an appointment this afternoon to figure out what is wrong with me.  I feel like this dead squirrel I found on a walk the other day.

seriously...who dies like that??

seriously...who dies like that??

On the real real, there is something wrong with my upper abdomen.  Every half hour I have an awful nauseating twisty pain that intensifies if I lay down or compress my stomach, so basically I cannot sleep or relax.  On top of all that I tend to slouch when I drive, and guess who had to drive from RVA to Farmville and then to Cville the last two days?? This girl.  Needless to say I am exhausted, in lots of pain, and am running on zero sleep.  I don’t know if I have simply an ulcer, or if I have Ebola and all of the organs in my body are turning to liquid…but either way I am agro.

I cannot find the culprit of my phantom pains, I haven’t been drinking any alcohol (woaaa I know shocker), I haven’t eaten any weird foods or raw meat like some savage, and I haven’t exerted myself except for hot yoga on Monday, but I have done that before!  I hope I didn’t yoga so hard that I ruptured my diaphragm or something! #namastesohard.  This morning was especially delightful, as you all know I am house and dog sitting for a colleague, and I am obsessed with dogs so this mostly benefits me…except my fury friend does not want me to sleep at all.  Shouldn’t he use his 6th sense and know I don’t feel well and I need my beauty rest?  I need mending Mooze please!

I am not sure what is ailing me, if any of you are doctors or nurses please self diagnose me because I love being an hypochondriac and pretending I have a lot of illnesses.  Hopefully the doctor will cure me this afternoon…till then I hope you all have much happier and healthier Fridays!!

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About btypes

I’m Bty. I live. I blog.
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6 Responses to I am Dying.

  1. Kim says:

    I would lay money on a gallstone attack (assuming you still have your gallbladder) or an ulcer. It could be appendicitis—I speak from experience that it’s not always necessary to have the common symptoms: I had it for a month before it sent me screaming in pain to the ER, but you’re not describing your pain being more to one side, like the right. Here’s what docs have told me over the years: center to right: appendix; center to left: gallbladder; center only: possible ulcer. Hope you feel better soon!!!!

  2. I am so sorry you’re sick! I’ve never experienced those symptoms so I cannot help in a diagnostic way. However, I’ll tell you one thing: DO NOT type your symptoms into Google!! Well, you’ve probably done this already. But the other day I left work because I felt feverish, googled my symptoms, decided I had bacterial meningitis, called Patient First and couldn’t even describe my symptoms the first go round because I was crying so hard because I thought I was going to die, really, I had convinced myself. And now I am BETTER! so it’s funny. Also, Mooze’s parent(s) need to get blackout curtains, it’s the only way I sleep in with Max, otherwise he’d be up with the sun wanting to go out and play. File that away for when you get a pup of your own!

  3. Oh, I am sorry you are sick!! Hopefully the doctor cures you!! :)

  4. Lauren says:

    I had a similar feeling and my dr diagnosed me with heartburn. Put me on prevacid and I was fine after that!
    Also another idea…once I tore my diaphragm and it kind of felt like that as well.
    Hope you get yourself fixed!

  5. Sir Robinson says:

    Try hanging upside down for an hour before bed.

  6. ashleyjonesy says:

    So…I realize that your post was about how you were sick and that is the pits but my favorite thing about this whole blog was the caption under the squirrel. “Seriously who dies like this?” and then I immediatley thought of Marvin and how I haven’t seen him in awhile….and that I hope he didn’t travel to see family in Richmond. This is getting weird. I’m sorry. I hope you feel better!

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